| I’ve been dancing since I was four years old. Starting with the traditional Mexican Ballet Folklorico and moving through jazz, hip-hop, modern, swing, belly dancing, and even African dance and Danza Azteca, I danced everything except Ballet and Tap. I was on the dance team, the pep squad, the flag team and very briefly on a cheer team. In college, we spent Tuesdays at The Mercury Cafe, our $5 entry fee covering a Swing Dance group lesson and the night’s party. Weekend club dancing and salsa lessons became standard. In Houston, we’d take two-step lessons on Sundays. The $10 entry fee bought us access to the nacho bar, a dance lesson and a night of dancing. Friday nights and $5 got us a blues bar dance floor. I attended every free or cheap dance lesson I could find, even doing free Zumba in the park after work on Wednesdays. In all of that time, I never took a single private dance lesson. Not one. In November, an opportunity opened up for me to take private ballroom dance lessons with Todd, an accomplished instructor here in Lakewood. During our first lesson, it became apparent that we were playing a game of “fix all of the bad habits you’ve learned”. While I’d taken a million different dance classes, had performed a million different group dance routines and had a quick mind for memorizing steps, I’d never had the one-on-one attention of an instructor or formal training in partner dancing. As a movement instructor who specializes in private sessions tailored to individual needs, I know the power of that personalized attention. I know how important it is. Yet, somehow, in my own life, I’d never done private dance classes. And friends, let me tell you, taking private lessons has taught me a few things. |
| 1. Budgeting my priorities |
| Private sessions aren’t cheap. If I’m going to dance weekly and enjoy those private in-person coaching sessions, my budget needs to accommodate that, and so does my schedule. Dancing weekly with Todd means that I need to find time in my schedule, every week, to head over to his dance studio. That means every Thursday is scheduled around that lesson. Hikes, runs, bikes, meetups, meetings, volunteering…everything now hinges on being done by 11am, showered and fed by 11:45 and to the studio by noon. Recognizing that private dance lessons require almost all of my discretionary budget is a big deal. And a big commitment. It means a whole lot less Amazon and a whole lot less spending on random fun stuff in general. Every purchase is filtered through “Dance lessons or new shoes?” “Dance lessons or concert tickets?” So far, dance lessons keep winning. |
| 2. Commitment |
| There is no way around it. Private sessions force you to commit. While it was super easy to slink out of $5 group class because I lost track of time and the instructor had no idea who I was anyway, I can’t just bail on private dance lessons and then come back 6 months later. Todd is a professional and has excellent late cancel policies. Flaking out costs me a lot of money. I also respect him and his team, and believe their time is valuable. Canceling without good cause communicates that I believe the opposite of that. (And for the record, I truly believe things like health issues, injuries, kid stuff and work emergencies are all appropriate reasons to cancel. Especially for my own clients. If you have a migraine or your kid just puked everywhere, it’s probably a good idea to call and we’ll figure something out.) |
| 3. There will be humble pie. (Sooo much humble pie.) |
| You can’t hide bad habits in a private session. Everything I’ve ever learned about dance has come from group classes, gym classes and bar dance lessons. That means I know next to nothing about ballroom dance AND have a lot of really bad habits. Yippee! This means my ego takes a major back seat every week and I frequently have to temper my frustration with a reframe. I know I love to dance. I know I want to be the kind of ballroom dancer that makes it look effortless and fluid. I know that Todd knows how to do that. And for now, I know that means my lessons consist of a lot of technique clean-up paired with learning new things. The bonus here is that the new things are mostly sans bad habits. Because Todd won’t let me keep the bad habits and makes me redo steps until I have done it properly 10 times…and then 10 times more. |
| 4. It takes time. |
| Y’all, I teach movement for a living. I instruct people on how to access and utilize their deep core all day…every day. It still took me six months to figure out how the eff to use my core while dancing. Thanks to a particularly slow rumba, I finally got it. And now, I can’t believe I didn’t get it. But it takes time. And if I’d never taken private sessions or quit after 3 lessons, I never would have understood this technique. |
| 5. Be ready to be amazed at your progress. |
| Every week, there is something that just clicks into place. Like dancing from your core or knowing that a certain hand gesture means spin once, while another gesture means spin twice. Because I get 60 minutes of undivided attention, I also get 60 minutes to ask all of my weird questions and redo the steps I don’t quite understand until we get them. Sometimes that means we do two steps for the entire class. (thanks brain!) Other times, we get through the entire bronze syllabus in a single session. Private sessions mean we do whatever my brain and body need to do to understand the movement. And we can take as much time as we need to make that happen. In just 6 months, I have gone from wall-flower status, watching the other folks dance at the Friday night socials, to being able to follow almost every dance. While I still haven’t attempted waltz or tango, I have ventured into Cha Cha, Foxtrot, East Coast Swing, West Coast Swing, Rumba, Salsa, Merengue, Bachata, Hustle, Nightclub Two-Step and this weird line dance that I absolutely cannot figure out. And finally, the absolutely most important thing I’ve learned from taking private lessons is… |
| 6. You have to know your why. |
| No matter what you’re doing, if you don’t know why you’re taking private sessions, the incentive to budget your time, your money, your schedule, and your priorities just isn’t there. Without a solid why, you can’t justify the commitment or manage the taste of that humble pie. Knowing your why helps you stick to the plan, even when it’s harder than you thought or takes way longer than you thought it would or should. And…knowing your why makes it even sweeter when you hit that first accomplishment. If you’ve been struggling to prioritize Pilates or Stretch lately or you haven’t managed to pull the trigger on an Initial Assessment yet, dig a little deeper into your why. Why are you taking Pilates sessions? Why are you coming to Stretch Therapy? Do you want to be pain free? Move easier? Train hard without pain? Work longevity into your training plans? Fix a wonky knee? Stand up on your paddle board? Stop bumping into chairs and walls? Get some restorative support as you train for a big event? Are you curiosity driven like me and just love the practice and exploring all it brings? Whatever your why is, let’s talk about it and let’s recommit. As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts on your whys. Shoot me a text, respond to this email, or bring it up next time you’re in the studio. Have a great day! -Rubecca |
| Commit to your why and book a session! |